Top 6 Epic Tourist Sites to Avoid*

I was reading an article written by a couple who traveled for six consecutive months. They talked about things they learned during this time, boiling them down to six. I promise I didn’t copy them with the “Top 6” list. I started it first with my Top 6 Epic TV Shows Relating to Food post.

The point that stood out for me was number six: “You Can’t See Everything”. This is a concept that previously created anxiety and guilt when I traveled. Random, gnawing, crazy thoughts ran through my mind like I hadn’t tried hard enough, or I shouldn’t have slept so I could jam more in, or I should have researched and planned more.

When we arrive at a new destination Chris (my hubby) and I try to jam in as much as possible. This has its pros and cons. Pro: get to see significant (tourist) sites and more of them - after all isn’t that why we flew to the other side of the world? Con: exhaustion.

Humans naturally reach a point of saturation. It’s like the concept of you can only know and maintain interactions with 150 people maximum, before the insignificant people fall off your consciousness. Think Facebook – do you really know, remember and keep in touch with 459 people on your “friends list”? Similarly with travel, doing and seeing everything is too much content and visual stimulation to absorb.

Instead you could take the time to smell the roses and let the place speak to you through spontaneity and mere observation. So that’s what Chris and I try to do now (except for the random booking of hard to get into places like Incanto in San Francisco, Momofuku in New York). We’ve had some of the best experiences usually on the last day or two of a trip or city, where we let loose, have no plans and wander aimlessly exploring and observing the locals.

I’ve had a flick through my mental catalog of trips and realised there’s a handful of epic places I’ve missed out on seeing. This is because I opted for smelling the roses instead of waiting in long queues. I decided to save something for next time. Maybe.

 

*more aptly titled: Top 6 Epic Tourist Sites Angie Avoided

 

1. The Louvre, Paris 

I saw the glass pyramid. I didn’t see the Mona Lisa. Chris had been another time and said you can never get close to the damn thing anyway. So I didn’t see the point in tackling the crowds (screw them) or straining my already bad eyesight. Instead we wandered through Montmartre, ate delectable Nutella crepes, drank coffee and power napped in Sacre-Coeur.

Montmartre, Paris, June 2011. Nutella on the corner of my mouth.

2. Vatican City, Rome 

My father, for a Greek, is not very religious. His contempt for the institution of church has stuck with me. So I wasn’t going to line up for six hours in 35 degree Celsius weather to get into the holiest of cities in the hope that I see some old dude wearing a robe. Yeah-yeah, great artwork and amazing architecture my friends say. I was in Rome - that shit is everywhere! My friend Stevie lined up whilst Patti and I got stuck into some delicious towering gelato, wandered, I’m pretty sure, the rest of the city aimlessly and sat on the Spanish Steps people watching.

Spanish Steps, Rome, August 2006. Friendly dog and stranger.

 

3. Anne Frank House, Amsterdam
Who wants to see a bunch of empty rooms where a girl in hiding from the Nazis wrote her diary? Don’t get me wrong, Anne’s story is significant and scary because well, she captured it in that diary of hers. If you really want to be frightened and understand the scope of Nazi rule and oppression, words on a page won’t do it, check out Auschwitz in Poland instead. Need I spell out how I spent my time in Amsterdam? Paranoid and confused, wandering the canals and getting stuck into small dutch pancakes that tasted like fluffy clouds.

One of many canals, Amsterdam, May 2011.

 

4. Stratosphere Tower, Las Vegas

This is one I actually regret. Five fucking days in Vegas (two days too long in my opinion) and we didn’t even hit up old, seedy Vegas. Instead I carry a small pocketful of vodka infused fuzzy memories interwoven with the sounds and flashing lights of slot machines, fake stripper boobs slapping my face, sleeping all day, partying all night and sleeping on the chopper as we flew over the Grand Canyon. Vegas baby, Vegas. 

Grand Canyon, Nevada, November 2010. Angie passed out on early morning helicopter ride.

 

5. Disneyland, Anaheim (Los Angeles)

The happiest place on earth wasn’t alluring enough. The swirling teacups will have to wait until next time, with some kids in tow to make the most of it. Instead Chris and I checked out the LA Angels play the Oakland Athletics at Angels Stadium, all whilst drinking beer and eating bad hotdogs of course!

Anaheim, California, May 2012. Baseball game: Angels vs. Oakland Athletics.

 

6. The Tiger Temple, Bangkok

My awareness of animal cruelty came into full swing during our Thailand trip. First it was seeing elephants carting fat tourists around in Koh Samui; then it was the suggestion of hotel staff in Bangkok to have my photo taken with a sedated tiger. No fucking thanks. I feel for the poor people trying to make a buck, I want to support them, I really do. I just don’t want to support them being cruel to animals, otherwise naturally supposed to roam free. I plan on seeing wild animals in their natural habitat on African safari. The Thai are going to have to work more ethically to get my buck. So instead we spent our money making the most of the great services they offer including mani/pedis and getting two massages a day.

Koh Samui, Thailand, February 2010. Captive elephant.

Los Angeles: Intelligentsia Coffee

When we hit the pavement on Abbot Kinney Blvd in Venice we came across Intelligentsia Coffee by chance. 

I was glad to find yet another coffee roasting house (thank you California) that took its coffee seriously and pumped out a tasty, fragrant brew. 

  

I was also glad to be proving wrong the misconception that there's bad coffee in America. Quite surprising really, this misconception, considering Americans are serious coffee drinkers. Throughout our trip in the USA I came to realise that its (coffee) is just different. Americans even have different coffee percolating apparatus that I am ashamed to say, I had never seen before until this trip. But then how many Americans can say they have the ability to make Greek coffee with just the right amount of crema? ...but I digress.

It was good to see a decent range of organic teas on offer as well. A hoorah to the past, a throwback to the good ol' days when America was under English rule. It seems one of the main reasons why coffee became so popular in the first place in the States was to stick it to the British once America became independent. They created their own coffee culture by relinquishing the culture enforced by the British during their rule.

This place was cool. The vibe was relaxed. The coffee was great. The crowd was varied and tech savvy, casually flicking through their smartphones while they lined up patiently. Hipster-ish even. Damn those head sock wearing hippies, they're everywhere and they find all the cool places!

What I didn't know then, was that Intelligentsia started out in Chicago, later opening up shop in Los Angeles and New York. Coast to coast domination.

If you're looking for an urban oasis with good coffee in Venice, check this place out, but be prepared to line up during peak times...which seems to be like all the time, at least the whole hour or so we were there.

Los Angeles: Pizzeria Mozza

According to some, Pizzeria Mozza has the best slice in LA. I didn't eat pizza anywhere else in Lalaland, so I don't have an opinion on this. I can only compare to pizza I've eaten elsewhere (Australia, San Francisco, Rome etc).

I'll be honest, when we hit up Mozza I wasn't too educated on things Mario Batali, Nancy Silverton or Joseph Bastianich, but they seemed to have a great reputation, especially if the line up to snag a seat in this place was anything to go by. I was prepared, our stopover in LA was only two nights so I wasn't going to risk it, I made a reservation ahead of time.

The pizza wasn't bad, just overcooked in my opinion and perhaps not the best combination of ingredients (they were competing for taste on this particular slice). What stood out for me were:

• the appetizers
• the dessert
• what seemed to be (and I'm probably wrong because I'm only assuming) a local West Hollywood crowd
• the ambience (its noisy so if you like a vibrant vibe, you'll dig it); and
• the Italian wine list.

And I mean it about the appetizers (especially the bone marrow) and dessert, they were hands down delectable, finger licking good. The two lovely elderly ladies sitting at the table next to us got more than they bargained for that night - they delighted in my constant groaning sounds and exclamations of "yum!" and "that tastes sooooo good!".

Bone marrow al forno - $12

 

Rub that delicious pickled garlic on the bread, then spread the marrow on. Yum!

Insalata mista - $8

Burrata crostone with Swiss chard,spring onion & Balsamico - $9

Finnochiona salame, mozzarella, tomato & Fresno chiles - $17

Banana gelato pie with hot fudge & candied hazelnuts - $12

As our trip through the states progressed, I came to realise how popular and how much influence Mario Batali has in the culinary sphere. I'm still not quite sure what it is about him? Is it his business mogulness - the fact he has opened numerous (successful?) restaurants throughout the states and abroad; the recent controversy surrounding his businesses; his influences on cuisine (whatever they are); his expertness on regional Italian cuisine; being an author and television personality; or the mere fact that he just manages to make so many people happy with his food? I think it's a combination of all these factors, and the fact that he is not a skinny man.

Never trust a skinny chef, they have to be sporting a pot belly to be trustworthy and likeable, nay, to be passionate about and to produce delicious food. Mario's shape, his roundness, his pudgy pink rosy cheeks and neck rolls remind me of a happy free range piglet roaming through beautiful green countryside, fattening up for slaughter and my imminent delight and enjoyment. By no means do I intend to be disrespectful or condescending. It's this picture of him I see that makes me think "this man enjoys his food, I want to enjoy it too, I want to eat what he eats".

I know you want to eat it too. Next time you're in Los Angeles, make sure to hit up Pizzeria Mozza, or if you're after a slightly more upmarket non-pizza version, head to Osteria Mozza conveniently located next door.

Oh, and I still don't know who Nancy Silverton or Joseph Bastianich are...

Los Angeles: Alcove Cafe & Bakery/Big Bar

Big is not always better. The coffee mugs are almost the size of my head - and I have a big head. Surely when it's such a big coffee it can't taste good? And it doesn't. Because its so huge, they have to make it really hot, so it burns my tongue on the first sip. Then it cools really quickly because of the massive mug and it's a puddle of bad tasting coffee / luke warm toilet water.

The breakfast is gigantic, with what looks like a whole pan of re-heated roast potatoes as a side to Chris' breakfast panino. The potatoes don't look appealing, I don't even attempt to try one.

I order the country breakfast: scrambled eggs, pancakes with fresh strawberries on top and a side of bacon. It was satisfactory. The eggs I could have scrambled a hundred times better with my eyes closed - they were a stiff mound of rubber. And the strawberries: not so fresh. At least not as fresh I've become accustomed to so far in the States.

Being also a bakery, they have a heap of baked goods on display, which I didn't try.

What I did like about this place were three things:
1. The massive outdoor courtyard with plenty of shade.
2. The area it's in (Los Feliz) as its a suburb I wanted to check out.
3. The people watching.

I guess that's probably the same reasons the Angelenos like this place too.

Next time you're in LA, steer clear of this place. There's way better places to have breakfast at.