Top 6 Epic Tourist Sites to Avoid*

I was reading an article written by a couple who traveled for six consecutive months. They talked about things they learned during this time, boiling them down to six. I promise I didn’t copy them with the “Top 6” list. I started it first with my Top 6 Epic TV Shows Relating to Food post.

The point that stood out for me was number six: “You Can’t See Everything”. This is a concept that previously created anxiety and guilt when I traveled. Random, gnawing, crazy thoughts ran through my mind like I hadn’t tried hard enough, or I shouldn’t have slept so I could jam more in, or I should have researched and planned more.

When we arrive at a new destination Chris (my hubby) and I try to jam in as much as possible. This has its pros and cons. Pro: get to see significant (tourist) sites and more of them - after all isn’t that why we flew to the other side of the world? Con: exhaustion.

Humans naturally reach a point of saturation. It’s like the concept of you can only know and maintain interactions with 150 people maximum, before the insignificant people fall off your consciousness. Think Facebook – do you really know, remember and keep in touch with 459 people on your “friends list”? Similarly with travel, doing and seeing everything is too much content and visual stimulation to absorb.

Instead you could take the time to smell the roses and let the place speak to you through spontaneity and mere observation. So that’s what Chris and I try to do now (except for the random booking of hard to get into places like Incanto in San Francisco, Momofuku in New York). We’ve had some of the best experiences usually on the last day or two of a trip or city, where we let loose, have no plans and wander aimlessly exploring and observing the locals.

I’ve had a flick through my mental catalog of trips and realised there’s a handful of epic places I’ve missed out on seeing. This is because I opted for smelling the roses instead of waiting in long queues. I decided to save something for next time. Maybe.

 

*more aptly titled: Top 6 Epic Tourist Sites Angie Avoided

 

1. The Louvre, Paris 

I saw the glass pyramid. I didn’t see the Mona Lisa. Chris had been another time and said you can never get close to the damn thing anyway. So I didn’t see the point in tackling the crowds (screw them) or straining my already bad eyesight. Instead we wandered through Montmartre, ate delectable Nutella crepes, drank coffee and power napped in Sacre-Coeur.

Montmartre, Paris, June 2011. Nutella on the corner of my mouth.

2. Vatican City, Rome 

My father, for a Greek, is not very religious. His contempt for the institution of church has stuck with me. So I wasn’t going to line up for six hours in 35 degree Celsius weather to get into the holiest of cities in the hope that I see some old dude wearing a robe. Yeah-yeah, great artwork and amazing architecture my friends say. I was in Rome - that shit is everywhere! My friend Stevie lined up whilst Patti and I got stuck into some delicious towering gelato, wandered, I’m pretty sure, the rest of the city aimlessly and sat on the Spanish Steps people watching.

Spanish Steps, Rome, August 2006. Friendly dog and stranger.

 

3. Anne Frank House, Amsterdam
Who wants to see a bunch of empty rooms where a girl in hiding from the Nazis wrote her diary? Don’t get me wrong, Anne’s story is significant and scary because well, she captured it in that diary of hers. If you really want to be frightened and understand the scope of Nazi rule and oppression, words on a page won’t do it, check out Auschwitz in Poland instead. Need I spell out how I spent my time in Amsterdam? Paranoid and confused, wandering the canals and getting stuck into small dutch pancakes that tasted like fluffy clouds.

One of many canals, Amsterdam, May 2011.

 

4. Stratosphere Tower, Las Vegas

This is one I actually regret. Five fucking days in Vegas (two days too long in my opinion) and we didn’t even hit up old, seedy Vegas. Instead I carry a small pocketful of vodka infused fuzzy memories interwoven with the sounds and flashing lights of slot machines, fake stripper boobs slapping my face, sleeping all day, partying all night and sleeping on the chopper as we flew over the Grand Canyon. Vegas baby, Vegas. 

Grand Canyon, Nevada, November 2010. Angie passed out on early morning helicopter ride.

 

5. Disneyland, Anaheim (Los Angeles)

The happiest place on earth wasn’t alluring enough. The swirling teacups will have to wait until next time, with some kids in tow to make the most of it. Instead Chris and I checked out the LA Angels play the Oakland Athletics at Angels Stadium, all whilst drinking beer and eating bad hotdogs of course!

Anaheim, California, May 2012. Baseball game: Angels vs. Oakland Athletics.

 

6. The Tiger Temple, Bangkok

My awareness of animal cruelty came into full swing during our Thailand trip. First it was seeing elephants carting fat tourists around in Koh Samui; then it was the suggestion of hotel staff in Bangkok to have my photo taken with a sedated tiger. No fucking thanks. I feel for the poor people trying to make a buck, I want to support them, I really do. I just don’t want to support them being cruel to animals, otherwise naturally supposed to roam free. I plan on seeing wild animals in their natural habitat on African safari. The Thai are going to have to work more ethically to get my buck. So instead we spent our money making the most of the great services they offer including mani/pedis and getting two massages a day.

Koh Samui, Thailand, February 2010. Captive elephant.

Top 6 Epic TV Shows Relating to Food

I’ve always known food had a hold on my life. From the moment I wake up to the time I sleep I seem to be in a suspended state between meals. This would indicate meals are the most important part of my life and everything else, consequently, happens around them

Think about your life. We must eat to survive; it’s as simple as that. Luckily in the first world for the most part, this does not seem to be an issue. In fact we as a modern society seem to be struggling with the reverse - excess.

Then think about those poor people in the third world who don’t have the luxuries we have, or even those living in a lower socio-economic bracket to us, living on or just below the poverty line.

The point is if we’re not thinking about what we’re going to eat; then we’re left with the alternative which is to think about what we don’t have to eat. Either way we’re consumed by food, amongst other things. For us couch potatoes out there, there is even a multitude of television shows and channels exclusively dedicated to our obsession with food.

I’ll be the first to admit there have been many times, especially during this winter, where I should drop the fork, croissant or glass of wine, get off the couch and got for a walk instead. But before I do, I compiled a list of some my favourite television shows which, although perhaps not obvious at first glance, if you take notice, you will also see that these too are centered on our shared obsession of food. These shows not only have food and drink scenes in them; they also explicitly demonstrate the culture surrounding food and drink in our modern day society.

You may ask yourself “why (only) six”? Five is too limiting and six is not as cumbersome as ten. It’s a nice even, single-digit number.

Top 6 Epic TV Shows Relating to Food

1. Seinfeld
2. The Sopranos
3. Friends
4. Entourage
5. True Blood
6. Mad Men

Seinfeld

Seinfeld demonstrates that for a show about nothing, food really is something important and at the centre of our lives. Monk's Cafe is the stage where the crew meet up to eat and spend a lot of their time. Outside of that think Soup Nazi; the mutton Jerry stuffed in the table napkins; George’s boss Mr Steinbrenner and his obsession with calzone; Elaine’s idea of selling muffin tops; the pez dispenser; the marble rye incident; Babu’s failing restaurant; the junior mint and the operation; Kramer getting banned from his local fruit market; the sexual power of mango; the big salad; the falsified non-fat frozen yogurt; the etiquette of dinner parties (wine vs Pepsi); Kramer’s wine appreciation; Jerry’s love of the black and white cookie; and the chocolate babka. 

  

The most mundane in life is elevated to something simultaneously significant, ludicrous and hilarious. “These pretzels are making me thirsty!”

Image sourced from ijk...s

The Sopranos

Tony Soprano loves his food and drink. All night benders; family dinners and functions; mob meetings at restaurants; Satriale’s pork sandwich; breaking bread at Artie Bucco’s Vesuvio; and reheating Carmella’s zini after he gets home from his mob activities. 

Image sourced from Changing Nature of the American Family, photographed by Annie Leibowitz.

Who can forget some of the memorable moments in the show that happen over a meal? Janice murders her fiancé Richie when he sits down to dinner; Tony’s mistress throws a tantrum and a steak at him (8:30mins into video); and Ralph Cifaretto is strangled by Tony in the middle of breakfast preparation.

The final scene of the series even takes place in a diner, where Tony and his immediate family meet up for dinner and dig into a basket of onion rings.

There’s even a cookbook dedicated to the show compiled by the show’s chef character Artie: The Sopranos Family Cookbook: As Compiled by Artie Bucco.

Friends

Where to begin? Firstly, Monica is a chef. The series is predominantly set in two locations: Monica’s apartment and the coffee house Central Perk downstairs. Monica’s apartment has an open plan living area which centers on the kitchen and kitchen table, where the friends drop by pretty much any time of the day. The coffee shop has what seems to be a reserved couch area for the gang to congregate at. If Monica is not cooking and feeding everyone, then they’re at the coffee shop drinking coffee and eating muffins. Sporadically, on special occasions such as dates or the odd birthday you see the gang head out to a fancy restaurant.

Image sourced from The Telegraph

The list is endless, but here are some highlights:

• There’s the long line of Thanksgiving Day feasts, two in particular which stand out.  There’s one where Joey commits to eating a whole turkey and another where Rachel makes a traditional Sheppard’s Pie/Trifle that tastes like feet.
• Monica, in her constant campaign to be liked by others, decides to make candy for the neighbours. The popularity and demand grows so high, that people start lining out her door and even Joey buys into the mob mentality.
• Ross finds out about Joey and Rachel getting together and invites them over to his house for fajitas. In his despair, Ross ends up drinking a whole jug of margaritas and passes out on the couch.
• Monica and Joey go to a cooking class where she pretends it’s her first time cooking, so she can go straight to the top of the class.
• There’s also the one where Monica tries to desperately replicate Phoebe’s grandmother’s chocolate chip cookie recipe.
• Joey never shares food. In one occasion, his date takes fries off his plate. When she goes to the bathroom Joey polishes off her dessert. She comes back, chocolate staining his face and he claims “I’m not even sorry.”!
• Last but not least, we can’t overlook Joey’s obsession with sandwiches. His sister even brings him a meatball sandwich as a buffer when she announces she’s pregnant.

Entourage

If Ari is not taking Eric to Koi to verbally abuse him, the boys are having breakfast and scoping out the chicks at Urth Caffé. Take your pick from Hollywood power lunches, dinner dates, hitting up the children’s BBQ area at a bat mitzvah, boozing it up in the VIP area of a club or a pool party. Most important of all they have Johnny Drama who’s role in the family is the cook. He’s obsessed with nutrition, fitness and providing his baby bro Vincent with the right foods to give him the energy and vitality he needs to be one of the biggest stars in Hollywood.

Image sourced from We Eat Films

True Blood

This show’s premise is that vampires walk the earth and are part of mainstream society. They survive by drinking Trueblood, the synthetic blood drink developed by the Japanese in order to feed the world’s vampire population. Of course there is always the alternative of people as food; human blood bags walking around just ripe for the picking.

There’s Merlotte’s Bar & Grill and Fangtasia (a vampire bar) where a lot of the action takes place.

Image sourced from US Weekly

One of the highlights is definitely Lafayette, Merlotte’s eccentric, gay, short order cook that injects some glitz and glamour into redneckville.

This week Amazon sent me a list of books I might like including True Blood: Eats, Drinks, andBites from Bon Temps. I’m putting that on my Christmas wish list.

Mad Men

You’re probably scratching your head. Don’t. This one is about drinking, beverages. You’re now probably thinking “but drink is not food”. Don’t split hairs. Food and drink are related; we orally consume and require both for survival (water anyway).

Image sourced from The Guardian

Don Draper and his cronies crack open the whisky and vodka bottles more often than people drink water. Difficult conversation? Pour a drink. Strategy planning session with the colleagues? Pour another one. Celebration? Go on a bender. Rough time at home the night before? Pour yourself a morning alcoholic pick-me-up. Any excuse or no excuse at all, these advertising suits are well accustomed to a stiff drink or nine. And make that a double, neat.